casual ultimate » and their children will form a family band

i don’t really know how to break this news to the internet other than saying: jess & julio are getting married. they are engaged to be wed. it’s been in the works for some time but now it’s actually happening. it’s beautiful, our little girl is growing up, their offspring will give maxine and audrey a run for their money and will be riding on two-wheelers before they can walk, we’ll all get to eat cake, etc. it’s pretty damn awesome all around. but now comes the hard part, and what we all need to help them with: planning.

first: do not get married on nationals or regionals weekends; once you factor in the bike season scheduled, i think you’re down to somewhere between the months of november and march. remember: there’s nothing more romantic than president’s day. groundhog’s day is also an option, but your superstitious friends might freak out if that thing does/does not see his shadow. on the plus side, you may be able to rent a live groundhog for use as a prop - ringbearer?

second: food is important, and you have friends and family running the gamut from vegan to hunk-o-steak. i think the safe bet here is pennys for the rehearsal dinner and a co-catered event by piece and hot dougs for the wedding. if tbrizzle is willing he could man the grill and cook up steak for carlo and himself. slider will handle cleanup.

third: cake. i cannot stress the make-or-break nature of cake at any wedding or wedding-related event. alliance is at the top of the list, but i strongly urge you to consider the swedish bakery. also, and i realize this isn’t custom - but who puts that cake under their pillow anymore anway? - but you should also serve ice cream.

fourth: outfits. i hesitate to say “dresses” because we all know that julio is a closet clothes hound and will want to look dapper as hell. i would like to throw in my two cents here and suggest you take all the money you save from catering your dinner with fast food and spend it on clothes for you - and of course the wedding party. it’s already been agreed that you will be coming to new york to go shopping with me and brooke. julio should wear a tie that matches your dress in color and fabric (don’t bother with white…who do you think you’re fooling?). and whatever happens, no one will be wearing shoes dyed to match the dresses. which brings me to my final point….

fifth: venue. if you want to wear stilettos, and i know you do, you cannot have an outdoor wedding. as we discussed earlier, a loft or other such space could be good because there would be plenty of room for dancing, etc. although not the loft michelle rented for new years; those were not all good memories. i plan to be wearing a much nicer dress and don’t want it ruined.

that’s about it for now. i’m sure jess will have tons of ideas, all of which will be scribbled down in a rhinestone-encrusted pink bridal journal of some sort. i hope there are helpful suggestions from martha stewart in the margins. this is going to rock. congrats to jess and julio!